Best Mommy Ever

"Mommy, can you believe there are other people out there who think that THEIR mommy is the best mommy ever? How could they say that to my lovely mommy?"

~ Kaley

Bugs

Me: "Kaley, try not to drop crumbs on the kitchen floor, or else we'll have bugs coming here to eat them."
Kaley: "How do they know the crumbs are there?"
Me: "They can smell the crumbs, and they follow the smell."
Kaley: "Oh, the smell is making them a map!"

Zombies

"Mommy, were zombies alive when the dinosaurs were here?"

~ Kaley

Rock Star

"Mommy, you should get a job being a rock star. I think Mem can watch us when you're at work."

~ Kaley

Sharks

"Honestly, Kaley, I am not sure if the sharks like your shoes."

Pounds

Keira: "Do you know what they call money in England?"
Kaley: "What?"

Keira: "Pounds."

Kaley: "Nuh-uh."

Keira: "Yes, they do." (in a surprisingly good British accent) "May I have 64 pounds, please?"

Kaley: "You're talking like Mexico?"

Keira: "No, I'm talking like England." (again, with the accent) "May I have 64 pounds, please?"

Kaley: "No, it's mine."

Husband

Kaley: "Mommy, I have a husband."

Me: "You do? Why didn't you invite me to the wedding?"

Kaley: "You were there, it's when I was doing ballet, remember?"

Me: "Oh, well, you didn't tell me that was your wedding."

Kaley: "Well, we got married when you weren't looking."

Me: "Is he a nice man?"

Kaley: "Yes, he's very nice.

Me: "Does he always tell the truth? That's very important."

Kaley: "Yes, he always tells the truth. And he's never tired after work, so he can always do the dishes."

Me: "Perfect."